"Not Now Maybe Later"

[swfloridabrat]

I have said "maybe later" when I mean it...the timing is sometimes off (too sore from a previous session or promised to play with another soon). But-if it is someone I have no intention of playing with, I just say "no, thank you" leaving no room for cajoling or negotiating. Sometimes when I say "maybe later" it is so I can seek the advice of other bottoms or play partners, but I always try to make it a point to tell the Top (politely) that I would or would not like to play...I think it is unfair to garner a reputation like BV's just for showing enthusiasm for our common interest!

[Adelina]

I am a very concrete person, so much so that I sometimes wonder whether I teeter on the edge of the autistic spectrum. I've had to actually train myself to look at people while conversing with them. I've gotten awfully good at reading people... but it is so, so much easier when people just say what they mean. It isn't fair to expect people to read coyness and dishonesty, and this is especially true in a party setting where there is so much noise and distraction. It is not rude to say no. It is not rude to say maybe if that is what you mean. It is, however, rude and disrespectful to say "maybe" if you actually do mean no. People deserve more respect than that.

BV is my dear friend and the most fabulous top and so good to me. It pains me to know what he's been through just because others cannot bring themselves to be honest. I would like to say more about it, but BV doesn't like me using that kind of language, so I shall stop here.