An eye-opener for me!

[sarah thorne]

I echo the sentiments of everyone else. Do what makes YOU feel good -- don't try to reach some standard you feel is there to make you a "true spanko".

True spankos like spanking! And spankings come in all forms! A few smacks on the bare bottom with the hand. Over panties. Over pants. Hairbrush, maybe. A belt. No implements at all, and never unless it's during sex. Some play for the sake of playing. Some incorporate discipline and punishment. Some get spanked for stress relief. Some start out hard and want to cry, have their limits pushed. Others just want the light, tingling sensation that comes from a light hand spanking. Some like public display, others prefer privacy of their endeavors.

Tolerance is also something that has to be built up for most people. But some never even want to get to that level and that is okay too, cuz that is what THEY want.

sarah (who is sometimes a wimp and sometimes hardcore)

[swfloridabrat]

Arianna, your husband could also be uncomfortable because he is not sure what he is doing-or supposed to be doing...that is why parties are so great. Tops learn from other Tops the various techniques and toys, bottoms learn different styles of interrelating (bratting, if you will). They are fun and allow you to explore new avenues. But, as everyone has said, we are all different and each spanking session has various motivations and reactions. (Also, TMI, for me it is hormonal how much I "want" or "can" take). Your actions and reactions will differ depending on your emotions. That is ok, too-just enjoy the discoveries!