In Loving Memory

[BlackVelvet007]

On Saturday August 4th, 2007, I met a beautiful girl named Michelle. She approached me near the end of OTK night at the local club and, to say the absolute minimum, we hit it off well. Well enough in fact that she came home with me that night.

She lived in King Of Prussia, PA, but after that weekend she started commuting into Manhattan on weekends just to see me.

She had red hair, glasses, and a smile that could melt stone. She was five years older than me but she looked ten years younger than me.

On August 24th, for no reason other than that we could, I accompanied her on a trip down to Washington D.C.

The next day, August 25th, we went to the train and bus station in DC to get me transport home because I had a work shift I couldn't get out of. At the train station, she asked me if the building we were standing in front of had any significance to me. When I said no, she said "Then I'm going to give it some." Turning to look me right in the face, she said "I love you". All I could do was stand there and think to myself, "Dang, she said it FIRST. Well, it's about time ONE of us did." And I kissed her. We were officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

She still lived in King Of Prussia, but she would commute to see me most weekends. I almost never leave Manhattan, and I lost one girlfriend because I wouldn't commute. Michelle had me taking the three hour train ride to King of Prussia on some weekends.

When I dislocated my knee in September of that year, Michelle came up a day early to help me find a physiotherapist for my leg. She patiently sat with me in two doctor offices.

October was an odd month for both of us. She invited me to meet her family, but my work schedule didn't allow it. I bought her a Spartan Queen costume to match my Leonidas costume from "300" for Halloween, but illness kept her stuck at home, and she didn't want me coming to visit when she was sick.

The first week of November, she invited me to be her date for the office Chirstmas party where she worked as a customer service rep. I was ecstatic.

Somewhere along the way something happened.

On Thursday, November 15th 2007 Michelle dumped me via email. Her reasons for doing so are her own and in all honesty I couldn't explain them even if I knew. I was heartbroken. I begged her to take me back, but in the end I honored her wishes and never once spoke poorly of her, though more than one friend tried to console me by saying she wasn't worth it.

At one point, I honestly considered buying this girl an engagement ring. It was only a passing thought, but by God the thought was there.

I took some photos of Michelle while we were in DC. It took me forever to finally download them but I did so in July 2008. I sent her the pics and told her that if she was ever willing to take me back, I would always welcome the opportunity. She responded four days later that while she appreciated the pictures, she was doing ok without me.

On January 1st, 2009, a close friend of hers emailed me saying "We have to talk about Michelle. Please call me at....". For one brief shining moment, I was stupid enough to believe that she was going to tell me that Michelle missed me and wanted me back. I couldn't have been more wrong.

On Christmas Eve of all nights, Michelle engaged in a breath play scene with some bastard named James. Without knowing or wanting the details, the scene went horribly horribly wrong.

Michelle is dead. The bastard who took her life committed suicide soon afterwards. Her friend was contacting me to invite me to her memorial next week.

On AOL I have a file containing every email she ever sent me. I was tempted to delete it a while back but I never could. Now that it's all I have left, I'm glad I didn't.

I'm not posting this to obtain sympathy or condolences (though I know most of you love me enough to send them). This is my eulogy to her, and I just want you to take a moment and say one prayer to whatever God you believe in for this one bright blessed angel who meant the world to me even if all too briefly. She was a beautiful girl who deserved far better than she got in this world. I miss her now more than ever.