A Brat's Diary of Visits to Wal-Mart

[BlackVelvet007]

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies rest rooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in Housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers I'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they can help me, I began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked my nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knew where the antidepressants were.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the Auto Department, practiced my "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loudspeaker, I assumed the fetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

And last, but not least .

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"


SOMEONE'S GETTING A SPANKING FOR THIS!!!!!!