Crossing the line...

I don't know if I have ever posted on this forum before. Hmm, this might be a first.

I have the problem you describe Aurora. I have a very difficult time saying "no" when someone crosses a line with me. I have suffered abuse during my life, both as a child and as an adult. I don't know if my inability to say "no" stems from the abuse I suffered, or if it has something to do with the way I was raised, or if it is just part of my innate personality, or if I am just too submissive. But I struggle like hell with this and I have for a long time.

For me, learning to love myself and value myself as an individual has been very important in combatting this. When I love myself I realize I don't want to be treated that way and I don't deserve to be treated that way, so I stand up for myself more.

I agree with what chuckles says about therapy. That is one way a person can learn to love themselves, by seeing a good therapist who can help them understand they don't deserve to be abused. It also helps to be surrounded by good people who can make you feel special.

I don't know if this situation refers to you or someone you know, but best wishes either way.