When's enough ?
 

It's me again guys, with yet another question :rolleyes:

SpankER's; When you give a spanking with the purpose of "teaching a lesson" what makes you decide when that is accomplished ? Is it determined by what the offense is and a set amount of swats ect ? Or is it judged by the spankee's responses ?

SpankEE's; At what point do you think your "lesson has been learned ?" Is it after the determined amount of swats per wrongdoing or do you feel it is fair to be pushed to your limits in order for you to walk away feeling guilt free ?

In my case it's judged on both, with more emphasis on the response of the offender and less on the offense committed. When spanking is used, I think that it needs to be something that gets into the recipient's basket, something beyond what she can take in her head and desparately wants to stop, but without getting brutal. But I would also emphasize that actual spanking is only a piece, and not even the major piece, of trying to achieve real behavior change. As a foundation I think that one must know as well as possible the one over whom they have authority, in both personality and in the details of their lives and the circumstances. Whether romantic or platonic, there must actually be a human relationship and a genuine care and concern for the person. Beyond that, it's necessary (to be effective) for the one in charge to actually have some maturity, to understand the real difference between true disciplinary spanking and spanking to tickle some kink need (for either party), and to use spanking as only one item in a much larger picture of guidance. And lastly, without getting too long in words, I would point out that much more behavior change is achieved through positive involvement (read that again-involvement), encouragement, praise, and frequent follow-up than through direct punishment, including spanking.

Speaking only for myself, tried and true methods, these are.

I think Gary nail it right on the bottom!
But to add to that I think if there is an expected number of swats, then the spankee is mentally taking an indurance test. If instead it is unknown how many swats they will recieve, then the discipline becomes more intense mentally.
As a spanking is being administered you can notice the levels of change in attitude. The responce should be the signal of when the spanking has done its purpose.
And, I agree, it should never be brutal.

I definitely don't need to be pushed to my limits although a lot of the time I am... for me, it's enough just knowing I'm getting a spanking. With everything I conjure in my head, by the time it actually happens, I am totally sorry, let alone actually getting the spanking.

Very good question. I've always found spanking to be an empathic experience. Somehow, as a spanker, you just know when the point has been made. That's usually when you say "Count these last 5 / 10 for me young lady.". I don't believe in setting a specific number of punishment swats beforehand, but it makes a stronger finish to have the last swats counted. And yes, the spankee's reactions play a major part in that.

As a domestic disciplinarian, I truly believe that "enough is enough" when the spankee demonstrates that they have experienced a painful consequence and then express remorse or contrition. If sassy mouth attitude continues, or acting as if the spanking is not affecting them, or they refuse to hold position...then obviously they have not been spanked enough! I will continue to spank until they either 1) cry profusely and apologize or 2) apologize. ;)

That is when I know that they have had enough.

Cheers!
Veronica D.

Yes Ma'am. *Sniffles & sobs* I'm very sorry. ;)

See, the thing here is there's plenty of visual proof that she's telling the truth. She gives a serious spanking. Believe it!

Hmmm....Amber is close...Veronica is close...seems to me, Gary, that you need to get these two together and let Veronica demonstrate the AS version of her 'serious spanking' abilities. And what a great F/f pair those two would make!

That sounds like a good plan. I'm not sure how great Amber will be that though...

Yes, I'm all for watching that!!! :D

Plus, Amber could really use a good thrashing, I think we all know that.

Ummm, yeah. That's it. AMBER.

Well as a spanker and in particular your spanker, I would have to say that "its enough" when I say "its enough". :D

But I was just asking a question. pout. Oh and you've already made that point clear on my behind.

Awwww Everyone's ganging up on Amber again. I'd feel really bad about that....if I didn't want to spank her as well. :) And Amber is ALWAYS Great, Gary. ;)

Now what did I do ?!?! :rolleyes:

How would you like the list? Itemized? Ordered alphabetically, by severity of offense, or by frequency? And would you like page numbers centered, left or right justified? ;)

RG, let's not sweat the details here, just forward that list to me and I'll take care of the rest.

I'll overnight it, and pack a video camera with it, WP.

Ok, now being little might not be such a bad thing, I'll be taking that list and looking for a small space to crawl into and hide now...

HAHAHAHAHA, I'm going to be laughing about this one for a LONG time, LOL. :D

No problem, but can you accept digital transfers? I'm afraid uploading it might take too long. ;)

Katie, I'm sure that you have an equally impressive list of your own and you are more than welcome to transfer yours as well. This time, however, lets use our own words, and I do accept digital transfers. :D

Lil' ole me? Naughty? Why whatever do you mean? Why I do declare!

LOL I declare that I'm glad I wasn't drinking milk when I read this because it might have come out my nose at this point. Sheesh. I love how threads take on a mind of their own. :)

BV, I agree, but when you have these unpredictable, naughty young ladies (Katie, Amber) that can't keep themselves out of trouble, chiming in and bickering back and forth, I guess it's inevitable that the original topic of discussion will get lost in the shuffle.........Ladies, new rule, getting off track on forum threads or causing anyone else to get side tracked in order to deal with any bratty behavior will result in a sound spanking and we'll let BV decide when enough is enough. :cool:

I think I can speak for Amber when Isay that we have no idea what you are talking about? Us naughty? Bratty? You must have us confused with our dopplegangers.

Well, Katie, I don't know what to say, I guess I'm just not afraid to call a Spade a Spade............ :D

Kind of like women? Especially ones who are brats?

I can see it now.

"Is it enough yet, BV?!"

"No....not yet....no, still not....mmmmm, no.....keep going.....ain't enough yet....need some more....not enough...."

Okay, I keep looking for a smiley that has the tongue sticking out... Like Katie said, you guys must have us mistaken for someone else. Between the two of us, we could keep you guys running in circles with your paddles and such ;) As for the consequence of causing a thread to get off track blah blah blah, I don't think that should apply to me here, because it's MY thread, I started it. Now where is that face with the tongue sticking out when I need it ?

:p :p :p And thanks to Wood Paddles and RG for the vote of confidence. Can't wait to see Amber and Katie again so we can put that into practice ;)

I do have to say that most young ladies are quite animated as they receive a real sound spanking, and I try to guage their body movement and tears as too how much is enough. Also, a discipline spanking is exactly what it is; a punishment that is meant to bring a painful and positve response.

Great. :rolleyes: I just love it when a top stumps me and I can't think of a mischievious comeback. Seriously, animated is a good word, it sounds much better than my own description of my response while recieving a real discipline spanking ;) I've always just referred to myself as a big baby, lol. I watch in awe sometimes clips of girls recieving a discipline spanking. I'm wondering in amazement how they are barely flinching or there is only a bit of whimper ! Some of us are stoic and well some of us are as agllov put it "animated" when we are in serious trouble.